I’m having an existential crisis over the internet installment that is supposed to occur in 30 minutes. I cannot stop pacing in my “front yard” of my rustic cabin in the woods. My mind is racing with thoughts about my life, the internet and connection.
This morning I went outside to see the sunrise as I have since I decided to slow down and simplify my life two months ago. There was a strong warm wind and I watched it make the grass dance to the great symphony of nature. I was enjoying it tussle my hair in front of my face when I remembered my appointment for the World Wide Web about to penetrate my care-free lifestyle.
This cabin has been the drapery of my dreams my entire life. I was unaware of this dream when I gave 30 days notice to my landlady for my 3 bedroom craftsman in Echo Park two months ago. I decided to follow Rumi words:
“Run from what’s comfortable.
Live where you fear to live.
Destroy your reputation
I decided to sell/donate/toss everything (except what can fit into a backpack). I also had a 3 room basement. This was a lot of stuff to get rid of. Cool stuff. Stuff I enjoyed. Stuff, which began to have too much importance. After all, its just stuff. The more stuff that left my front door, the freer I felt. I began to feel that anything was possible and then I found the cabin in the woods I’ve dreamed of all my life.
Now its only 20 minutes until that man arrives that connects me to the rest of the world. I noticed my breathing became shallow and faster. In 20 minutes I will be able to connect with my “friends” on facebook and watch cute animal videos on youtube. I will see all my evites to Birthdays, Baby Showers, Yoga Workshops, Wally’s Wine Monthly Newsletter and all the interests that the WWW knows about me.
Did I want all this in my nature sanctuary? After I get plugged in, will I read fewer books? Will I continue hiking for hours at the State Park steps from my cabin?
5I did see that sign on my walk this morning. Was it a ‘cosmic sign’ or that ‘aha moment’ that Oprah coined? The sign was posted at the beginning of a trail. It read, “CLOSED TRAIL: Healing in Progress”. It was touching to see humanity care about Earth’s health. I secretly hoped it contained what Jung calls “Synchronicity” and this sign was also a message to me.
15 minutes and I will be able to open up my emails. It’s been 6 weeks! How many emails? What did I miss? I went to my writing group last week and the Professor announced that one of my comrades in commas (who is a journalist for the LA Times) would be late because he had to cover “The Harrison Ford plane crash”. Of which I didn’t know. Was I missing out that I didn’t know about the real life adventures of the actor in the Indiana Jones movies? How much or how little does news alter our lives, our thoughts, our time?
10 minutes and I will be able to receive texts on my smart phone. All I can think about is: is it better for society to be so connected? Does it make our collective communication skills better or more meaningful or just faster? Is faster better than slower?
It’s 5 minutes away and I’m sweeping the leaves out of my cabin for the Internet man. I’m excited to finally be able to open my writing class syllabus, google the name of that Thai restaurant that has a Thai Elvis performer, read my favorite blogs, check out my friend’s instagram and Skype with all my Certified Goddess Workout Instructors AND all from my loft bed in my rustic cabin in the woods.
Here he is! And here I am. Reunited with The GoddessLife Community and it feels so good.
Posted on Fri, March 13, 2015
by Ms. Dolphina